


Love, Murder, and the Donkey Kong Family

by OfficialNintendoStories



Category: Donkey Kong - Fandom, Film Noir - Fandom, Nintendo
Genre: Dark, Film Noir, Friends to Lovers, Job - Freeform, Murder, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:47:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23555572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OfficialNintendoStories/pseuds/OfficialNintendoStories
Summary: One rainy is like any other at your PI office but then suddenly in walks a tall glass of Monkey Flavored Water.
Relationships: DK Crew/Underworld, Donkey Kong/Reader
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	1. New York, New Monkey

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CaramelKruze](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaramelKruze/gifts).



CHAPTER 1 - New York, New Monkey

It was a dreary day in rural New York, but then again what day wasn’t. He walked into your office, his wet fur dripping on the shag carpet that your assistant Debbie insisted we had put in. You had seen him around the town before then, after all, he was an ape of unforgettable musk. He walks into your office, smelling of cigars, baby powder, and monkey. 

“What’s an upstanding gorilla like yourself doing here on a day like this,” you ask, breathing in his scent, it permeating your nostrils.

“Hoo hoo Ah ah,” He responds drearily, “I need your help with something,”

  
You normally aren’t quick to trust people, but you can see by the look in his large, dopish eyes that you can believe every word coming from his slightly hairy lips.

“I’ve heard you're the best PI in town,” He speaks softly, as if the might of 1000 suns endow his words to be as light as the breeze. “My brother, Funky Kong, was murdered last night,”

“I'm sorry to hear that, Mr Kong,” you speak softly, you knew what it was to lose a loved one, and if every family member in the Kongs was as strong as the hulking mass in front of you, you knew it had to hurt even more.

Donkey sighs, “At the end of the day we hoo and we ahh and then it’s done.” He seems to snap out of his haze, and with his big eyes stares you down with feverish intent, “I need you to find the killer,” he spoke bluntly suddenly, as if he was hardened by the thought of his family member. You are dazed by his suddenness and taken aback by his looks, it takes you a second to formulate a response, but you stutter one out,

“Of course I’ll help you,” After all it was your job to help out such interesting clients, and not to mention the extra bonus of getting to work with such a striking gentlem--FOCUS DAMMIT-- You have a job to do now, and a man died.

You’re on autopilot now as he gives you the details: 36, African Male with a tint of pale. It seemed like stuff you had done before. After the details were done with, he pulled out his wallet from his jacket pocket, as soon as he whipped it your hand is up, touching his and pushing it away, declining the offer for payment.

“Please,” you say “I never take money from a monkey in mourning”

He takes a deep breath in through his gigantic nostrils.

“Thanks,” He says0 with a sigh out, deflating like a balloon left on a hot beach for an hour too long, “It’s appreciated,” You share a look, a look that feels like the entire world is melting away, just you and Donkey. It’s magical, but suddenly he breaks off and begins to get up.

“Thank you again,” you notice the way he looks now, downtrodden and at the floor, “I have to go now, funeral planning and all that”

“Of course,” You say patiently, “Thank you for stopping by”

He nods and leaves the office, turning at the door to give a slight nod as he emerges from your office into the rain. Even though he is a client you know there was something more there, something sensual. But for now you had a job to do, you prepared your things to leave.00

“Debbie,” you say to your assistant, “Time to go to the nightclub, for love."


	2. Going BaNanas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You go to investigate to scene of the crime, but an unforeseen adversary blocks your way.

CHAPTER 2

You arrive at The Smokey Joe, the local nightclub, to realize it has been completely shut down. Police Tape and an officer standing guard were no worries for you. You walk up to the front doors to address the guard,

“Sir,” You say firmly, knowing that a calm but strong approach will work best, “I am here investigating the murder of one Funky Kong.”

He looks skeptically at you for a while. Then he sighs and stands to the side, beckoning you through.

This place is classy, or at least it is when the bright fluorescent lights aren’t on. You gaze in awe at the majestic roof and the circular architecture before spotting it, the tapeline. You walk closer, its large, ape sized, and you can still make out the slight blood around the edges. The police did a pretty good job on this one, and you can’t help but think this might be a dead end, until you spot it; under the corner of one of the chairs in the lounge. You quickly walk to investigate, and there it is, a business card, it has a message and a number on it.

“BaNana and Pops one stop shop. Your home for everything Banana exports.”

Damn it, This Kong was involved deeper in illegals then you thought. Bananas had been contraband for years here, and it appeared that a certain Kong was in over his muscular head. You head home, ready to call the number.

Before you can step outside the club you hear a footstep behind you. You whirl to see a figure standing there. He’s a Kong, you can tell by the way he stands, even if he is short. He stands at 4’11, and speaks with a cold steeliness in his voice.

“My uncle called you, are you any good?” You can tell by the way he asks he has already formed an opinion, “I’m Diddy Kong by the way,”

“I have a long list of clients that would recommend me, all you have to know is I will try everything I can to solve this murder,” you say this, but as you do you feel his cold calculating glaze sweeping over you.

“Don’t fuck it up then, for him,” He gestures towards the tape line before marching past you and out into the street. You watch after him before following and getting into your car. You only had one lead, but it was all you had and you had to trust the system. 

You dreamed of him that night. You tossed and you turned fantasizing about the things he could do to you, You thought of the eye contact, the binding with vines and banana peels, how you KNEW he would take care of you during the ordeal. Then afterwards he would caress you just the right amount, sending you softly into a sleep that refreshed you perfectly for the following mornings work. Donkey Kong.  
You wake up in a cold sweat. The number. The job. It all faded away last night. You can’t let that happen again.

You get out of bed, opening the curtains to let the morning sun in. You sit down on your bed, starting blankly at the cellphone as you play with it in your hand. You don’t want to have to go undercover again, not after last time, but you know that a key part of this case was the Banana industry. You slowly dial the number, lifting the phone gingerly to your ear,

“Hello?” you speak firmly, these people need to know you mean business, “I’m taking over for my associate, you know him as Funky Kong?”


End file.
